Beziq

I give you me...again!

2006-04-11T03:26:00.000+02:00

Rage only!!!!

Lately.

2006-04-07T01:31:00.000+02:00

Hee hee hee heee! ( thats not a laugh its alama ya mshangao in kiuk). Its been long since I blogged but thats because I had lots of stuff to do, including my last placement and my thesis which I was almst halfway but then i dropped from the group so I decided to do it lonely instead of having both of us three do it I wasnt happy with the topic and those small small disagreements didnt jazz me at all, despite all that am cool. Today is my 10th day without a phone and I cant wait to hav it on again, I wanted to try a month but thats too much, am doing it for 14 days only.
Theres this special person whos coming to do her masters here in Finland and this whole thing is giving me hibidabachibiz because I can't wait.

Culture extinction.

2006-01-24T13:03:00.000+01:00

I was talking to one guy about culture and that made me do some in-depth exploration of my cultural background, what do I know about my culture? Do I have one? What are my cultural beliefs, values, and practices? If I have do I impose them and how? Its so sad that we or rather I seem to have given up my culture to some other, and I dont even know which one. Apart from me having a kikuyu name and being fluent my mother tongue what else do I treasure? The first thing I ever put on my bedroom wall was a Bob Marley poster, not even my moms photo... damn! Am I ashamed of my culture? And what have I done to prevent the stereotyping that has occured?
Enough with the questions! I tried to convince myself that we dont have time to keep examining our culture. I thought of how people find it funny and outdated if a jamaa or a chic speaks english in some accents like Kikuyu, Nyeri Luo or whatever language they speak, but if you have that strong American or British accent....now youre talking! Depending on where we are, sometimes we have to pick an accent or no one will understand the hell you're talking about, haha!that reminds me of one guy in my prima who went to mombasa like for two weeks and came back with that coast accent and he was calling everybody 'mtoka bara.'
The only cultural thing I'll pass to my kids (when i get) will be my mother tougue and making sure the mother beats them up when they do wrong, thats the only way I can perpetuate the Gikuyu Mumbi cycle.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you ME!

2006-01-09T22:09:00.000+01:00

Thats how mean BEZIQ was, I didn't want my friend to touch my bike, I was just about to throw one big tantrum in shagz. Behind us is a 'sukumawiki plantation'

Lost post.

2006-01-09T17:56:00.000+01:00

This thing is curazy 1st I lose a post then when I publish another it goes below the previous one. The new one is DRAMA below HAPPY NEW YEAR.

Happy new year.

2006-01-08T04:01:00.000+01:00

Happy new year everyone, Love and many hugs. I have so many stories I dont even know where to start, I think I'll unpack first.

Drama.

2006-01-06T02:21:00.000+01:00

My trip to london was abit dramatic because I woke up late the day i was supposed to be travelling but those were the repercussions of going out the previous night, despite waking up late, I had to do some last minute shopping. I got all the things I wanted and all the presents I was taking to everyone, almost missed my flight but you know almost doesnt count so everything was ok. I was in in london at around 23.50 and there was a very stupid and sexually frustrated lady at the passport control, she just wanted to bring it out on this poor african young man, she took my passport to one guy (her superior i think) who told her to just lenga the whole thing because am coming from an EU country and he said he's sure the scanning had been done already. Hehe! I almost laughed at her but I just smiled. That wasn't enough, she took me to some desk and started asking me stupid questions like why am going to the UK, how much money I have cash and in my accounts, my address.... She left and came back like in 3 minutes and told me to fill another form because she'd misplaced the one I'd filled before, thats when I got mad and told her I cannot do that again, I told her I dont know the address and am not going to make another phone call asking the same questions I asked like 7 min ago, I was just about to raise my race card, "ARE YOU DOING THIS BECAUSE AM BLACK?" Well I guess she felt that coming because she cut the b.sht before I smacked it on her face and thats when she let me go.
I went to stockwell where I met my friend and straight to a club with my luggages, the door man told me they don't do bed and breakfast and that I had to leave when everyone else is leaving. I spent xmass at one familys house, we were so many and it really felt like home. On the 26th we went to a club called Motion, am not a pevert but I have never seen so much butt in my long living life, it was like a butt congress, and I refuse to go into details.
We left the club and from far we could see a big yellow thing on the front wheel of our ride, thats when you start hoping that its one of those big yellow plastic bags (that have a calendar and a horse on the other side). We got closer and it was not a plastic bag. Our ride had been clamped!! It took us like 45min to get a cab.

Boyfire goes to London

2005-12-15T23:28:00.000+01:00

Well, Boyfire was my nickname for a short time, I have no idea where that came from and I didn't like it, I still don't so don't dare!!! I finito my placement today marking the start of my holiday. I wasnt sure what I wanted to do this x-mass but I've made up my mind that 'nittaeda radan' 1, because my friend is graduating on monday so I'll be there and 2, because I don't want to be here eating ham and drinking glogi (Finnish x-mass season drink). Its not that I hate it, but I have done it quite a number of times and change is as good as a rest. I got a relatively cheap ticket but the airport is like an hr and a half away but who cares.

Despite all that has been happening lately, am hoping to relish myself in London....haiya! Just remembered that my friends mother and two of his aunties are coming for the grad' so that means no pinting...hm! The other option I have is to go stay in harrow (like i know where that is) so wherever it is I hope we'll have fun but the grad' boy told me its in a far zone so I'll get acquainted to the bus driver and the train crew.

Promises??

2005-12-15T22:54:00.000+01:00

Tracy Chapman - The Promise

If you wait for me then I'll come for you
Although I've traveled far
I always hold a place for you in my heart
If you think of me If you miss me once in awhile
Then I'll return to you
I'll return and fill that space in your heart

Remembering Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting
If you dream of me like I dream of you
In a place that's warm and dark
In a place where I can feel the beating of your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting
I've longed for you and I have desired
To see your face your smile
To be with you wherever you are
Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting
I've longed for you and I have desired
To see your face, your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
Please say you'll be waiting
Together again
It would feel so good
to be In your arms
Where all my journeys end
If you can make a promise
If it's one that you
can keep, I vow to come for you
If you wait for me and say you'll hold
A place for me in your heart.

Tsk tsk tsk!!!

2005-12-14T00:11:00.000+01:00

Apparently, the young african maiden and the Punjabi doctor walked down the hospital hallway to a secrect room and thats where they did the kissing.

Some of it.

2005-11-21T18:13:00.000+01:00

Lately I've been so busy with my placement and my evening job am hardly doing anything else,my b.day was on the 18 of this month & so I'd taken some days off, you know this comes once a year. I had no plans of partying or something of the sort, I just wanted to chill at home, relax and think of what I want with my life..Resolutions and stuff.... haha! yes I still do, I'd even thot of getting a bottle of wine (what was wrong with me?? substitute beer?). I didnt get the wine so I did the thinking all day and two of my friends came later in the evening & we decided to go out to a nearby club. It was fun but we met some weirdos who told us they have three dancefloors inside their house-Yea, we asked that same question..Why they came to squeeze on one.-

We all went to my place after and we were woken up on Saturday by the our friends who had like three 12packs each, hair of the dog was the only way foward and so we started again, or was it continue? My housemate got me a cake and nobody was even looking at it there was something else that seemed to capture their attention, while others were playing mama kiwinja here. Later in the evening we all decided to go to a reggea concert but we didnt stay there for long, we hopped the whole night and by the time we were going home nobody was talking.

Never be the same again.
On the other hand, I was still thinking about my very good friend who lost his mum, it was hard for me to accept it. She was a very nice, open minded, funny, friendly to everyone and so supportive. She used to remind me how I used to follow my mum everywhere when I was young, that's true, its like I was chained to her. W.T.F is death? Why does it have to hurt so much? One minute you're with someone and the next they're gone forever and never to be seen again...Am I being pessimistic? I guess no because when death comes all the beautiful things in life disappear, or maybe its just that some people expect to heal the wounds of pain faster and that's impossible while others never expect to heal or deal with it.

Death makes it hard for us to reminisce lest you say some stuff and trigger some memories of painful events. You can't even ask a friend something like "Can you remember when we were stealing your mom's car then she saw us?" something like that! Are you with me? I think the best thing we can ever do for the loved ones who have left us is to treasure,maintain & endeleza what they had started, by that the world (or rather part of it) will recognize that someone existed. I also think the one who started the system of naming the first kids after the parents was a genius, I respect all the others like naming with the season but...Let me just say thanks to whoever. (Gikuyu and Mumbi maybe).
I believe they watch on us from up yonder. God Bless.

Oranges
When people were being skeptical about oranges and bananas, I had nothing to do with it. I had a lot going on and most of all am like on the other side of the Baltic sea my vote doesn't count, Am sure we went orange for a reason and I hope that reason will help change our country esp' the schools and the health care. I still don't understand why we had to give thousands to the superpower and am sure the money was used to purchase bullets if not C4's, anyway, let me leave that to Michael Moore.

Its not that I hate responsibilities but I miss the days when I never used to worry about a thing, just be behind my mum and my world is complete, I miss my growing up, I miss my first kiss, my first love letter, the first date and how nervous I was, I miss 'fishing' in my moms bag knowing I'll get something nice. I need to go to bed now.

What am i?? A shit magnet?

2005-10-24T12:34:00.000+02:00

I dont know if am supposed repeat what R.kelly said that only Osama can understand me because I had a really interesting month, it felt like I was in a rollercoaster the whole time. I did like a million things and cancelled like a thousand it was full of much happiness, sulk, tantrums, undercover, vigorous and dangerous things but I enjoyed anyway, the funny thing was that I had to fix my window now that winter is here and I had to use one bolt but I didn't want to go get one from the shops, first I dont know what its called in this language and I didnt want to be like the woman in the EXE flour advert'.
"I want flower!!"
I decided to get one bolt from my bed and fix my window and thats what I did, later in the night I thought Katrina and her sister Wilma had come to visit me because my bed just fell down and you can't imagine how scary that was. I fixed it anyway and thats where DONT TRY THAT AT HOME!! applies.
My bed falling was the least of my problems because at the same time I had to make a some tough decisions in my precarious relationship and my very good friend who makes me feel better was unwell. Did I mention that I started another placement in a half mental and alcohol detox' center? Yes! I did and its not as busy as my last one but its interesting, I've seen people with real social problems that opened my eyeseses & made me rectify some stuff before its too late.
Today a patient came with a six pack and I had to pour it.... tsk... tsk ...tsk... I dont think I will get over it soon, Who in this God given world would pour three litres of beer in a sink and feel nothing?? Who?? I don't want to think about it. Am doing two shifts when I can so am using every free minute in bed...Thank God its friday. As I said in one of my previous post, my new life is still on. Am I mixing up stories?? I thot so! I promise to write something that makes sense next time.

What do you people think about long distance relationships?

Scene 1

2005-10-08T11:07:00.000+02:00

Its so sad that sometimes people have to be asked to go to the hospital and spend the last minutes with their loved ones, and its even worse when youre the one dealing with the family and stuff....Am not allowed to talk about that, so I guess I'll just write a small scene from shrek.

Donkey: On the road again, ..sing with me shrek...I can't wait to get...on the road again...
Shrek: stop singing!!
Donkey: Can I whistle?
Shrek: Noo!!
Donkey: Can I hum??
Shrek: Hum it out.
Donkey: Hmm, hmm hmm....What are you planning to do when we get there?
Shrek: I dont know.
Donkey: Why dont you grind their bones for your bread?...You know... the whole ogre story.
Shrek: Little donkey, theres a lot more to ogres than people think.
Donkey: Example??
Shrek: Hmmm! ogres, are like onions.
Donkey: They stink?? Because onions stink.
Shrek: No.
Donkey: Or they make you cry??
Shrek: No.
Donkey: Ahaa! They start cracking and peeling when you leave them in the sun..
Shrek: Donkey, no!! Ogres, have layers, onions have layers, ogres have layers onions have layers. End of story bye bye.
Donkey: Cakes!! cakes have layers too.
Shrek: Ogres are not like cakes!!
Donkey: Puffet! Puffet have layers...Everybody loves puffet. Shrek, when was the last time you told a guy, hey lets go get some puffet, and they say, hey I dont like no puffet?? Puffet is the most delicious thing on the whole damn planet, do you have a tissue or something? because the word puffet is making me mess.
Shrek: Stoooop talking!!!! You know what donkey?? I prefer your humming.
Donkey: I still think that puffet is the best.
- End of part 1 -

Night shifter

2005-10-04T13:08:00.000+02:00

Last night I had a night shift and it was so boring, am doing my placement in a cardiological observation room, we have ten telemeter monitors where we watch our patients from...sometimes I feel like a security guard but the good thing is that am with the best tutor ever. Here is the thing, I left the place at seven this morning and am not sleepy at all....(thanx to you who woke me up) and if I don't get some sleep now, I'll fcuk the night up, am supposed to meet my friends we go pinting because we have a free day tomorrow. So I think 1 beer is the way to go now. "Hey guys I need your 'backs' at the fridge...chop-chop!!"

Crazy cousin.

2005-10-02T16:23:00.000+02:00

I was laughing alone because I was thinking about my cousin, he does some unbelievable things, he has no limit to doing things like what you'd think of doing when youre mad, he literally does it...I remember there was a time my other cousin was getting married so we were all in the line apart from him and he was so mad and nobody would understand why he was mad and he just cant be on the line. On the D-day everything was as planned and almost everybody wanted to know where my crazy cousin who I will call Botha was.
As we were in the church, the pastor started talking and as usual some advice to the newly weds. He started with the wife and he said stuff like the way she should be taking care of her family and the husband, not to be a gossip, lazy,playa,...yea, all that! Then he started talking to the young husband, he was like, And you kamau, dont be like those guys who drink all night, they dont give any money for food and yet they want to eat, those people who beat up their wives and kids, all they think about is alcohol....as he was talking, we heard a big bang and it was Botha hitting a chair, he stood up and started talking
"Pastor, pastor, Nikii uranjuria?? Ndakuria nikii uranjuria?? uradema niki?" (Pastor, why are you into my business, talking about me in a sarcastic way?)
"Mutumia dahura ni waku? njohi niwe unguragira? ndiaga gwaku? eeeh eeh? dakwira wandema ringi niukuinamia...tigana nanii kabisa." (Is it your wife that i beat up, do you buy me alcohol? do I eat at your place? ha? Am telling you if you talk about me again you'll regret...leave me alone.")
Botha was dragged out by some guys and i was so traumatized because I was young. He went out and the pastor laughed and said "Am sure now you know what I was talking about."
We all thought the drama was over till when we saw the pastor soaked in mud, Botha had gone to the back of the church and got some stinking mud from the kitchen drainage and threw it to the pastor from outside then he ran away. It was so bad and my other cousins thought it will only be safe if they get him and lock him somewhere till the wedding is over and thats what they did, He was locked in a goat pen and thats where he was enjoying his rice and fanta to help him sober up.

To all the lollapalooza's

2005-09-28T18:01:00.000+02:00

Have you ever wondered how you can meet someone and in a matter of time He/She changes your way of thinking completely and you start seeing things in a different perspective?... As a kid, I never thought I would ever want to leave home and live bymyself without seeing my mom especially abroad,meet other people, love someone,.....No! that never crossed my mind.
The funny thing is that I have done all that and this post is for all the people who've contrubuted to making me what or who I am today, all the friends I've met and gave me new ideas and ways of thinking, helping me grow and supporting me in times of need and also for being with me in times of happiness. I thank you all from my Mom to to the night bus driver who drives me home when am drunk (although i pay). I can't forget all of you bloggers for sharing your thoughts, this really helps and you all know what I mean. Thank you! God for us all.

Fiona please.

2005-09-26T01:26:00.000+02:00

Fiona, I know you have the powers to transform small things into humongous issues, you know very well that this fight is the last thing we need and since you went to the land of far far away, all we have is trust and if we let that go down the drain, we'll have nothing left, so all i can ask is for you to tell me what you want because I dont want to keep thinking that things will work out while you think otherwise. The donkey, gingerbreadman,muffin man, and the puzz in the woods are always asking about you and all i say is..."Aaah shes ok".
I dont like comparing relationships but the dragon and the donkey are apart too and they seem to be much more stable...from what I'v gathered. Anyway, Lets take care of this thing as grown ups and I just hope that this drama will come to an end. Am still living in the swamp, some changes but everything else is still the same, and the donkey always visits. As i told you, I have a weird feeling about all this, I hope things will change.
Yours shrek.

Red corner.

2005-09-26T00:02:00.000+02:00

Mimi nawaabia mutakweda huko huko na mukikuja hukuhuku, mutashikwa na hao hao, mutachapwa, mutafugiwa, na mutarudishwa kuko huko mulikotoka. Kama munavyo ona, sisi tuna mabastora ya guvu na visu kali kali.
We were listening to some Tanzanian guys from our colle' and that swa' sounded so funny.
A kenyan would say.. "Niwai mbao"
Tanzanian... "Mshikaji, naomba unisaidie na shilingi ishirini pesa taslimu za banki kuu ya Tanzania"
Kenyan..."Si utakam?"
Tanzanian..."Ningependa unijulishe ya kwamba kama utaweza kukuja kama tulivyo agana?"
I wonder if in Tanzanian schools they had those long essays and insha's we used summarize from a thou' words to 250, Man! they dont know what briefing is. (Najoke msijamu). (Mimi hapa nilikuwa nafanya mzaha kwa hiyvo mandugu na madada wetu wa kutoka huko Tanzania msichukulie haya maandishi kibinafsi asanteni).

High school.

2005-09-25T13:35:00.000+02:00

It seems funny when I remember all the things we used to do in high school, all the bad and the good experiences, the thing i loved most was drama fest', we were good in that because our level was the nationals and every year we had to do something by Mutaba, (the great poet). We had clic that we believed it was untouchable and we also tried to keep intouch even over the holidays by going out and mostly jam...hehehe! jam, we were jam hopping from f2, maddy, zigzag and all, thats after having a beer at princess (by then i was doing 4 beers only), Yea am talking about form 1 and 2. We could also meet the Nyokabis from the sister schools and we really had fun together....as i said , i used to love drama fest' because in the evening we'd start competing who had many souvenirs and phone numbers, some pple used to fake it and even send themselves love card as we discovered later, anyway, Many guys used to have a nyokabi from every girl school around and there was a time we lost it when we saw the St lucy kiriri Nyokabis, they had class considering our school was not one of the best around, we didnt even have a truck at that time. maan! ...t.b.c
But when we got to third form we had grown out of that and we were more of the big tymers and no more jams in funny places, we used to riot with my friend Neeb and after sometime I met Haras and that was the best thing that happened to me in my high skul life. ( where are you?) that time vybes the club was the talk. We used to be there and we never missed beauty and the dj compes'.

Accident.

2005-09-25T02:13:00.000+02:00

It was one chilly friday morning in the outskirts of Thika in a boys boarding school, everybody in a jovial mood bacause we were holding on to the trophies in many ball games but all that mattered was soccer. Our principle was into it so he decided to give us a treat and that was gettin the best 'mathree' to take us to where the next soccer game was supposed to be... 'I want my mbois to lide in stael". So that morning we got ready and by 'we' i mean the guys whose names were on the list and trust me one would do anything to get their names writen down because that would be the only time to meet the Nyokabi's and Waithira's from the all the girls schools around.
I was i form one and I had a godfather who was supposed to be tutoring me and taking care of me...(the bullying and stuff) he had told his mum to come to school that friday and bring some shopping and so he suggested that since i dont have a Nyokabi, I should be left at school and wait for the mum to come I get the stuff. I felt like my head is going to explode because it had costed me alot to just get my name on the list and FYI after paying all those people responsible for getting my name on the list, I had some responsibilities and that was to take care of the players bags and all that when the game was on. That whole thing was a big predicament but despite all that i still wanted go.
I didnt want to make my godfather angry so i decided to be left, I had like 10-20min to sell my name to some other interested party and so i rushed to the stock brokers who in less that 5min they had sold it and someone else was going instead, they were so good businessmen that even my ironed shirt and trousers was rented for 10sh you know the Nyokabis had to be impressed, so atleast I didnt lose much because i got some cash back.
My house was kifaru and almost everybody was going and some of my friends brought me their keys because they didnt want to lose them. I didnt want to be there when the mathrees were leaving because that would have felt so bad. 80 people went and after sometime like 100 more went by their own means. My godfather's mum who made me stay didnt turn up....you can imagine how i was feeling. That evening at around seven we heard the guys coming, they were so loud and we could tell that they'd won. After like 20 mins the other mathree hadnt come and we started to get worried wondering what had happened. The principle got like two guys from his prefects troop and they went to check, like 4km away from where our school was, the mathree was there and from what i heard, the principle just fell down from seeing what had happened.
The van had hit a ditch and rolled, some guys had been thown like 50meters away and some were stuck inside the van. There were some people who were trying to cut the roof off the van to get them out. They were rushed to Thika district hospital where some had to sleep on the floor because there were no enough beds. That night we were not told anything officially, only that there was a small accident and they were taken to the hospital. Little did we know that that was the biggest disaster in the history of that school. The next day very early in the morning we were had an assembly and we knew things were thick when we saw who had come to address us, it was the minister of education Mzee Kamotho. We were supposed to leave school at 10am but by around 8.30 am telling you even those people from the rift valley had been picked up by their parents. My mom came and got me and she couldnt believe because she had entered all the wards before she came to school but she didnt want to go and identify the bodies. She told me at one time she saw someone who looked like me and because his face was swollen it took her like 5mins to see am not the one. And thats when she decided to come to school. 24 students had died one teacher and two touts. Ambulances were allover bacause people had to be moved from the district hospital to better hospitals.

THE AFTERMATH.
....coming soon....

Good friends we've lost.

2005-09-25T00:59:00.000+02:00

I got an email from my friend and informed me that he had just come from my my former schoolmates funeral, I dont know what happened to him but thats so sad considering how young he was and maybe it was someting that would have been prevented, but all we can do is just pray for our friends whom we've lost, may God rest Mose's and Morgans souls in peace.

Winter.

2005-09-25T00:32:00.000+02:00

Man, winter will be here soon and i realized that am in denial because I haven't shopped for winter clothes, not even gloves!!! Am sure I'll go running to the stores soon. great day bloggers.

2005-09-25T00:05:00.000+02:00

Reality in time.

2005-09-13T07:40:00.000+02:00

Innocent kenyans walking in the streets of nairobi, some suicide bombers came and blew them up, i say check this check this, check this check this, we cant take it no more...how long is this going to last?? Because I've thought and thought more that a thought... thats why am writting this poem, a poem that shall speak of reality unwanted, reality violated.This poem shall speak of the wretched sea that washes the scalps of the shores leaving mothers cryin for their young ones wallowed up by tsunami and katrina...This poem shall speak of the embassy bombing in Nairobi and Dar, This poem shall speak of the Kenyan leaders embezzling public funds to the cayman islands and swiss banks, this poem shall say nothing new this poem shall speak of time, time unlimited time undefined This poem shall speak of the educated jobless kenyans in the streets, this poem shall call names, names like kenyatta, Ouko, lumumba, Kimathi, Matiba, nkrumah, hannibal, akenaton, malcolm, garvey, haile selassieThis poem is vexed about apartheid rascism fascism tribalism riots in molo , kuklux klan riots in brixton this poem shall speak of the stampede in carnivore, mathare slums, the promises made by our leaders when campaigning, this poem is revolting against 1st world 2nd world 3rd world division man made decision this poem is like all the rest, this poem will not be amongst great literary works will not be recited by poetry enthusiasts will not be quoted by politicians nor men of religion. This poem shall speak of you, You cheating on your partner, making them think you'd never do something like that.This poem is knives bombs guns blood fireblazin for freedom... yes!!! this poem is a drum, mau mau warriors uhuru uhuru uhuru kenya uhuru soweto uhuru afrika.This poem will not change things this poem need to be changed this poem is a rebirth of a people arizing awaking understanding, this poem speak is speaking have spoken this poem shall continue even after poets have stopped writing.This poem shall survive u me it shall linger in history in your mind in time forever, this poem is time only time will tell, this poem is still not written this poem has no poet this poem is just a part of the story, his-story her-story our-story the story still untold about this poem,This poem is now ringin talkin irritating making u want to stop it but this poem will not stop this poem is long cannot be short this poem cannot be tamed cannot be blamed, the story is still not told about this poem.This poem is old new, this poem was copied from the bible, your prayer book, nation newspaper, taifa leo the new kenyan constitution, playboy magazine, the n.y. times readers digest, the c.i.a. files, the k.g.b. filesThis poem is no secret, this poem shall be called boring, stupid, senseless, this poem is watchin u tryin to make sense from this poem, I have feeling that this poem is messin up your brain, makin u want to stop reading this poem, but u shall not stop reading this poem, u need to know what will be said next in this poem this poem shall disappoint u because this poem is to be continued in your mind in your mind in your mind your mind.....